The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
