i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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