he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize