Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
as a side note pls kill me
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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