If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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