Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
