I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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