White coat. Heels.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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