i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize