mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
