Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
how drunk are you?
Several
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
