The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
