Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
