Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize