Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
