Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
