I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
