Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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