oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
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