There is no way he is gay with that hair.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
He had one of those small greek statue penises
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
