i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Randomize
