whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
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