420 ftw
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
