He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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