i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
