they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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