Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
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