5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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