I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
she told me i tasted like america
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize
