I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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