Have you finally orgasmed yet?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
