North Korea, Best Korea!
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
