His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
he thought i was a dude.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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