Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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