Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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