I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Everything about him screamed your future.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
