I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
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Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
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Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize