She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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