Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I have already put on my inside pants.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
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