Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
