Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Randomize
