Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
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