this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
