brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
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