but the lizard people decide everything anyway
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
