For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
