R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
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