Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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