she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize