nut hugger
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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