he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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